This was too good to not get online as it was happening. Stay tuned. I’m sure it’s going to get better…
I’m flying to Boston to go on a consulting visit with a longstanding client. I arrive at the gate in Kansas City and I’m told that I can’t carry on my small bag because the overhead bins are full. No problem - can you gate check the bag? NO.
Uhm, I had dreams of catching an earlier flight out of DC, but you cannot do that when you check a bag. No biggie, but it still was frustrating. I tried to pull the status card and I was bluntly told off. On my merry way.
Get to DCA for a long layover, and I look at my baggage claim tag and he wrote the wrong (right) flight number on it! Meaning, on US Air Shuttle flights (short hops on the east coast) the flight numbers are only 2 off. Sweet.
I get in line for the earlier flight, wait 30 minutes and right before I get to see an agent, they cancel ANOTHER flight to Boston, so all those passengers get in line for the flight I’m trying to get on. I give the guy my boarding pass and he immediately throws it back to me and says “No way”… I say, “Escuse me?”. He proceeds to tell me he has to onload all the cancelled passengers before me. It’s at that time that the lady below shows up, gets in my face and asks me what my problem was. I told her I didn’t have a problem, I was trying to understand why I could not get on the flight. She then cut me off, put her finger about an inch from my nose and told me to shut up. Now, I was totally calm. In fact, concerned that I was being an ass, I looked at a fellow traveller behind me in line and I looked at him with a puzzled look on my face and shrugged my shoulders. I then asked my new US Air friend if I could ask her a question. She then swayed her finger at me (like I was 5) and said if I needed to calm down and if I spoke she would call the police and I’d be arrested. Nice. Now I was pissed, trying to figure out how my (truly) calm demeanor was illegal. I stood there like it was a face off. She finally told me I could talk. I asked her “Why was I in line for 30 minutes when you guys cancelled a flight a few minutes ago and now all these people could go ahead of me in line?”. Her response, “I don know why you stood in line for 30 minutes” - I finally walked away, not saying anything.
Cool. I’ll just get on my original flight. Now I have 2 hours to kill. No biggie. Free AT&T Internet, so I’m good.
Board the 9pm plane I was originally scheduled on, and settle into my exit row seat. Now… Keep in mind moat of the people on this flight are either commuters or were on the 5pm (majorly delayed) flight that got cancelled.
The captain comes on and tells us that we will taxi out to the “parking lot” and because of bad weather our wheels up time is 11:10pm. The entire plane starts screaming and yelling. I’m not kidding. People are cussing, and the my friend who threatened arrest earlier comes onboard and starts yelling at everyone to call down and sit down or she would have the police come onboard.
What am I doing? Laughing. Truly laughing my butt off.
She gets everyone calmed down (via fear and intimidation) and says thatvif anyone wants to get off the plane, they could now.
Then, ole boy behind me gets on his soapbox and starts yelling, on behalf of everyone on the plane. It was way too much to type but I did get the last part of it recorded with my camera. I mean it was hilarious. He was screaming. I stood up like I was stretching right when he finished and snapped the pic below.
Surprisingly, they didn’t do anything to him. He bitches, on behalf of an entire plan, screaming at the flight attendant and does bit get arrested. I ask a question and she wants to call the cops.
It’s now 9:40, we have not left the gate, and people are relatively calm. I bet there will be more to this story. What do you think?
Stay tuned. I love travel.
(PS - I typed all of this on my iPhone, so sorry for any typos or fat fingers…)
